What’s your new year resolution? The question hovered across the table on the new year’s evening.
That’s where the ideas and goals for the new year started! Most commonly stated were “I want to lose weight” “I want to stop meeting negative people” “I want to stop overthinking” Ï was sitting in a corner and observing the conversation. This conversation reminded me of a client approached for coaching for goal setting. There was something prominent to note in all these conversations. Be it new year resolution or goal setting for your own life, the most prominent pattern observed is our mind is focused on “what we don’t want” rather on “what we want”. When we talk about our problem or something that we DO NOT want, our mind is focused on problems. This often leads to over analysis and there is a possibility to develop a mental block in our minds. Consequently, our mind gets drained and we lose focus. However, a little tuning in our thinking process has ability to impact our life in very positive way. If we focus of “something” that we want, then our mind focuses on solutions. This could be anything. A self-talk, a formal or informal conversation or a goal setting of our life.
Imagine a situation where you are having a mindful talk with yourself and thinking only about problems and things that you want to “avoid” or “don’t want”. The entire talk will be around problems and not solutions. Once you have a fair idea of the situation that is not serving you good, we all have that ability to shift our focus to solutions. Here are simple 3 step processes to develop this shift
- Observe your choice of words
When you write your journal or have a conversation with someone or with yourself, observe! is my talk or choice of words are full of problem or negative words? Is my thinking being full of “have to stop” “avoid”?
Most of us do this mistake in our goal setting or planning. we need to be sure that our goal statement is full of achieving “towards something “and NOT “away from something”.
The next step will help you How!
- Convert your words / goal statement into “towards something”
If your goal statement says, “I want to stop meeting negative people” then ask your self If I want to stop meeting negative people, what it is I Can start”. The probable answer could be “I want to start meeting happy or positive people” that’s where the magic of words starts.
Here is another example If your goal statement says, “I want to stop overthinking” then ask yourself, “what is it I can begin with” may be “I want to start taking actions”
This small shift in our thinking process can create a tremendous opportunity to seek solutions.
- Practice!
Remember! there is phenomenal power in practice. If we are mindful about the power of positive goals or statement we make, the practicing this will be your biggest success! Very soon it becomes a habit and you will be known as a “solution seeker “than a “problem thinker”.
Be it your self-talk, public talk or any goal setting exercise, always ask yourself, “if not this then what!” “what is it that I want”.
This solution oriented thinking shift will not only create difference in your mindset it will also help you reach your goals faster and with ultra-clarity of what and how’s of your goal. As you are weaving spirals of positivity!
Remember, clarity is power! And clarity converted into a positive goal creates a strong foundation and first step of your victory
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